Rough times

So apparently, 2014 has been overwhelming and no, this is not my reflection for 2014 yet. Been going through tough times every now and then, and only just now I had a moment of roughness again. I was contemplating whether or not to document down my feelings, just as I've asked Ed about this issue too. I guess my answer is pretty clear now.

Warning: This post is going to get very wordy.

Time now: 1:53am.
You know things aren't going very well when it's near 2am.

Few hours ago, I received a piece of bad news by my supposed-to-be Boss. I was supposed to be working at Company A. As I've approached Company A before but the hiring period was closed, the boss was nice enough to approach me, asking if I'm still interested. Of course, being jobless, I happily accepted this offer. The boss told me in details all bout the job scope and what I can expect. Incentives were great and there was nothing more I could honestly ask for.

When asked for schedule, I sent it the following day after she asked for it, stating clearly when are the days I'm available to work for the entire month of Jan 2015.

I was then added into the group chat. This made me even more sure that I'd get my job, since schedule has been sent and will be confirmed again when the date comes, and since I've been included in the group chat, which means I'm part of the family right?

However, earlier on, I was told that priorities were given to committed staff and thus I've no remaining slots for the entire month of Jan, just 2 vacant slots which were not taken by anyone. How unfair is this to me? If I've been told that priorities would be given to committed staff, I'll have nothing to say. BUT, I believe I should receive equal treatment as any other staff who wishes to work there by having the same type of schedule (whereby you work a few days per week as required). Instead, I was treated as a spare tyre - to fill in the vacant slots only when needed.

Obviously I was pissed off, and disappointed at such bad management of staff and scheduling. Understanding that managing of schedule is tough, one should not overlook the fact that there are newcomers joining in the team.

The final mutual agreement was that I (initiated to) leave so that no waiting is to be done by either parties. While the boss have kindly offered me other ways out so that I still get to work, I don't think it's of any good solution.

Bad handling of human resources as well as time management for staff, and so much time wasted on my side to wait for schedule, in hope that I'll be able to earn some extra pocket money so that I can stop saving up like mad.

I could've gotten another job which has arranged an interview with me, but I rejected it due to Company A's supposed confirmation of job. I could've used the time to find other jobs, instead of waiting for the supposed schedule to be out.

I'm not sure if I'm in any wrong, and I'm not sure if things are entirely her fault. Either way, things still fell apart. I can only pray that I'll be able to get a job soon, so as to stop worrying bout so many things.

2014 is coming to an end, and I'm pretty sure I'll have better ways to end it happily.

x.