I guess I'm prolly too tired and thus all these friggin thoughts are kicking into my mind, but I just can't get it out and hence this impromptu post.
Been chatting with friends for the past hour (I guess) and I realised I got more and more tired. It wasn't physically (like duh im on bed using phone and laptop, how tired can I get) but instead, mentally.
Talking about studies, and I'm like, shit this I'm stuck at tutorials, why must there be tutorials, why must assignments exist? Aren't we supposed to learn in a fun way? Sure, tutors and lecturers tried to engage us to study better and have more motivation to learn but the thing is that bc of tests and scores, it kinda de-motivates us. Why are studying for the sake of studying, for the sake of getting good results, for results determines our future? So often we said that the future is in our hands but so many obstacles to clear...
I also hate how things are being taken seriously. I took up Korean lesson bc I wanted to learn, not exactly trying to be a professional at it. I merely wanted to have a taste of it but it's kinda getting out of hand hah. I'm not gna withdraw from it of course, but I just don't like how it has become a burden. Having to stay back after school to attend the lessons, do the homework and submit them and take exams ...... Too much. Why can't I learn it for fun bc I just want to? CCAs - I signed up for it bc I'm interested in it, to have fun. But why take things so seriously yet again, so bothered by the points given for attending this and that.... NOT FUN.
I've got thoughts of discontinuing studies after Poly. Like, why bother going Uni when everyone will still end up at the same place? It's either with or without cert and I don't really think it makes a difference? With cert, you'll just stand a higher chance in getting a good job offering you with so many wonderful opportunities. But who says you can't do anything without cert too? As long as you've got the right attitude and positive thinking, I don't see what can stop you from achieving your goals too.
I'll like to make it clear that this isn't about giving up, but walking another path which isn't losing out too.
Talking about appearance, we compare ourselves way too much with others. Millions of people on Earth, none being perfect. We've tried too hard to be perfect, but I honestly believe the most perfect ones are those who can embrace their imperfections well. That's why no perfect ones are on Earth yet, bc none are willing to do so. And I'm part of that 'none'.
I honestly have no idea where I'm going or what I'm trying to drive at. Maybe I'm just trying to persuade and enlighten myself, giving myself more hope so I won't stop doing what I really love or want to. Whatever. Am I making sense at all? I'm so tired haha.
